A little apology can be good for the soul (27, 02, 2010)
Former MLB home run king Hank Aaron says that Mark McGwire should now have a clear conscience after his recent apology for using performance-enhancing drugs as a player.
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Retirees can go from being milked to milking the cow (20, 02, 2010)
Canadian citizens have noticed a strong odour emanating from Parliament Hill where the first results of prorogation has been leading to some interesting...
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Sines and cosines and the language of love (13, 02, 2010)
I hated math in school, and it caused me pain and endless sorrow so I think it brilliant of me these many decades later to use it in such a positive fashion...
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Send in the seniors to terrorize the terrorists (30. 02, 2010)
Forget about x-rays and pictures and dogs sniffing bags and the CIA and CSIS and all of the other useless techniques tried thus far. Send in the seniors.
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I'm having Hansard withdrawal with Ottawa on hold (23, 02, 2010)
To bored seniors out there who daily depend upon Question Period and the diligent reading of Hansard for their prime source of entertainment, I feel your pain.
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You are about to forget about 80 percent of this column (16, 02, 2010)
Dear Mr. Retired Person,
Amy in our grade five class read us your newspaper answer to her question about changes that happen when you age. Do you have any other interesting facts?
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Getting older is kind of like losing socks in the wash (09, 02, 2010)
Dear Mr. Retired Person,
Our teacher gave us another project. We have to write down ten things that change as you get older. I thought you would be great for this because you are so old.
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Feeling down this New Year? (02, 01, 2010)
The frantic Christmas season replete with last-minute shopping, excessive eating and singing the same carols over and over is finally kaput. My hope is that you did not receive.....
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It would be nice to think green this Christmas (19, 12, 09)
Recently, Miriam and I were awarded large gift-wrapped items we had won in draws. When we opened these baskets, we discovered that in both cases, the packaging was responsible for two-thirds of the bulk. Excess paper, wrapping and stuffing provided the steroid-like huge size. How ridiculous.
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Sure-fire (and cheap) ways to spice up your relationship (05, 12, 09)
I have enjoyed great success with post-it notes. They come in a variety of colours for that special effect. Go to the grocery store and purchase the items that I mention next....
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Attention senior citizens: you better shop around (28, 11, 09)
I suppose it's a lot like the airline business. You get on an airplane, and if you ask three different people what they paid for their tickets, you likely get three different amounts.
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The trick to a long life is a sense of humour (21, 11, 09)
It's scary when you start to make the same noises as your coffee maker. You know how it gurgles and sputters and then sighs? That's Miriam and I in the morning.
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Ailing friends have imparted a doctor's worth of knowledge (14, 11, 09)
My doctor is 72 years old. I figure if I had paid more attention and taken notes, I could easily have accumulated several credits towards a medical degree. I calculate that just in the normal course of events, by visiting our friends, I could easily acquire the information required to pass any medical exam that involved ears, knees, the heart and kidney.
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Advice from someone with lots of miles under his belt (7, 11, 09)
I can advise people all day long without getting unduly tired in the process.
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Our Mens' Book Club is taking competition to a new level (31, 10, 09)
I do not remember who the culprit was who thought he was Julia Child, but somebody made chili for one of our meetings. Next, there was pizza, and then somebody baked a pie, and it escalated such that the host no longer has time to be part of the book discussion, confined to the kitchen, preparing lavish treats.
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Edward De Bono remarked that humor is the most significant activity of the human brain. Someone else said that if you don't use it, you lose it, and mother, who frequently managed to get in the last word,
advised that laughter was the best medicine, probably because we were poor and could not afford a doctor. To help keep our collective brain power intact as we age, I invite seniors to read some of the following articles that were printed during the past nine years in my St. Catharines Standard "Over 60" newspaper column entitled, "Retired, eh?"